Dream On: Out with Evil Emperor Zorg Minor

Speaking of fluffing up the dream pillow and getting down to brass tacks for a brighter future, I plan on starting BIG. For instance, it's time to give the presidency a major overhaul now that Congress has morphed into a new animal with a conscience. Let's get rid of Evil Emperor Zorg the Minor (translated from space alien-speak into English: George Bush Jr.) who is puppet to Evil Emperor Zorg the Major (pain in the butt) and his many minions of cyborg flesh-and-oil eating zombies. See him smile in his uniform.

Who is George Bush Jr., spiritually speaking anyway? I asked the cards. The cosmic gypsy winked and drew two cards, coyly fanning them out on the velvet table next to the big crystal ball which sees nothing, nor ever really has. Well, no big surprise. Bush is a CLOWN and an EXORCIST! Who didn't already know that? But really, the universe is backing us up here, if you had any doubts about the veracity of your perceptions.

BUSH THE CLOWN.
We've all seen Bush on TV making a fool of himself, clumsily tripping along, bumping into emergency vehicles as he surveyed the hurricane damage in Florida. Or heard his bumbling speeches sprinkled with famous "bushisms," now immortalized in little books guaranteed to make you laugh if you didn't simultaneously feel shame and guilt for being in a country that elected the big boob to start with.

Most of the world ridicules Americans for our stupid fascination with celebrity that compels us to award actors and clowns with the highest honor in the land. Other parts of the world, the ones we are vandalizing in the name of democracy, only wave uzis and drive car bombs in our face, hoping the stupid Americans will get the message and go home.

BUSH THE EXORCIST. Hmm.
Exorcists usually pull devils out of people, but in this case Bush and his bully-devil-cronies are exorcizing smaller countries of their power and riches, while robbing our own country's juju through a lame-duck congress too afraid to buck up against the too-too touted "Support the troops" defense.

Puh-lease! Most of our troops in Iraq are on their third tour of duty... don't tell me they want to stay longer.

While Bush's ratings are at an all-time low, it appears that many previously fooled Americans are getting savvy. Isn't it obvious now that the WMDs weren't there after all; that Bush and Cheney really did lie? American's are such gullible, soft, sometimes stupid (did I say that already?) people. Even Clinton, who got his dick stuck in his zipper, has resurrected himself. How will we regard Bush the Clown, Bust the Exorcist, Bush the Invader in years to come? Will we be able to look back with a sigh of relief, acknowledging that a sordid chapter in American history has finally passed, that the American people are learning not to hand over the keys to kingdom blindly? That they will not be so trusting of their leaders? That trust must be earned?

So besides the smaller dreams that propel me into future worlds of my making and unmaking, I cast my lot with the big Kahuna cosmic powers that (I pray) will smile upon us little people and bring sweet justice and long-awaited honesty to the biggest little democracy in the free world. While we're out fighting in the name of democracy everywhere abroad, I vote we bring it on home and dethrone the despot and his power-eating goons.

When the 60s revolution fizzled, I hoped instead that our brave ideas sprouted in salons of culture, university ivory towers, and on the lips of the homeless and disenfranchised on the mean streets, would fall on fertile ground. Hoping that maybe later the average jane and joe would wake up and realize there is a fox in the hen house and that to leave the driving to a company endorsed by an ex-footballer who murdered his wife and her friend would only land us ... where we are now! In the end, do as smart buddhists say: "Abandon all hope!" Which means, stay in the NOW.

Putting hope aside, my dream is that we continue to wake up and notice the Bush sleights-of-hand and other diversionary tricks that have kept us focused on Weapons of Mass Destruction (sounds like a video game) while Cheney and Bush grab up the oil interests in the Middle East. I say, let's usher Bush out with a round of "Impeach him!"

In my BIG dream for the future election in '08, I imagine Leonard Cohen running for office. Schwartzenegger's campaign lawyers find a foreigner loophole, and Cohen my man brings poetry, art, honesty, and rock and roll vision to the land. We'll be making love again and press conferences will be uttered in poetic ballads ...

"Sail on, sail on
o mighty Ship of State!
To the Shores of Need
past the Reefs of Greed
through the Squalls of Hate
Sail on, sail on
—Leonard Cohen, "Democracy"